2 Ways to Discover Your Raison D’Etre – Reason For Being

Raison D’Etre is French for reason, or purpose, for the existence of someone or something. Each and every person comes into this world with a purpose, unique talents to achieve that purpose and the inner wisdom to guide them along the way. This is a birthright. Without exception. Since everyone walking this Earth exists, you would think that everyone knew his or her purpose in life. Unfortunately many people are disconnected with their Raison d’etre and are plodding along, successfully or not, spending their life energy and time doing something that may feed themselves and their family yet starves their soul.

We do not live in an either/or world. We live in an “and” world. You can do both. Simply put, the reason you are here is to express your full potential using your unique qifts. You are here to tap into the intuitive driven passion that achieves the purpose of bringing forth your unique gifts out into this world – expansively. For those that feed their soul, do what makes their heart sing, work is play and each day is an opportunity to express to the world who they are, what they are here to do. Life flows seemingly effortlessly. Even with the ups and downs, twists and turns, life is fulfilling and worth the ride!

For those who live off-purpose, doing what they think they ‘should’ be doing, live can be exhausting and unfulfilling even if successful. Those who have turned their back on their raison d’etre feel like something is missing and will sometimes joke that they “still don’t know what they want to be when they grow up” well into adulthood. If you struggle to find joy, energy and satisfaction in your work and in your life you are living off purpose. You are not living a life in alignment with who you are at your deepest core. Chances are you don’t even know what your unique talents are let alone use them. The funny thing is, many people don’t see what their special gift is because it comes so easily for them. They find it so easy and effortless to do what they excel at naturally that they think everyone can do it. It doesn’t occur to them that this unique talent is theirs as a birthright with which to express themselves and build their life around.

“Seek the wisdom that will untie your knot, seek the path that demands your whole being.” ~Rumi

There are two simple ways to get a glimpse at who you really are and what your unique gift is to share with the world:

1. Think back to when you were a child. Who did you admire or aspire to be? Was it a famous person, a character in a book or movie, a relative or teacher? Who awed you, made you stop and pay attention? Once you have identified this person, what attributes of this person impressed you? Were they brave, funny, larger than life, strong, loving, free, giving, smart? What was it about what this person or fictional character did that called out to you? List as many attributes and actions as you can.

For example, as a child I was awed by a character I saw in a movie on TV, “Auntie Mame”. Auntie Mame was a woman who was eclectic, fun, fashionable, surrounded herself with wonderfully odd creative and talented people, traveled around the world and experienced fun and fascinating events in her life. She lived this rich in experience life and mentored others to do the same. Oh, how I wanted to be Auntie Mame! However, I didn’t see myself then as being extroverted enough to put myself ‘out there’ as she did, take risks and stand up for who she is and what she believed in. As an adult, I reconnected with my truth and now live a life centered in the truth of who I am, enjoy rich delicious experiences, am surrounded by a wonderfully eclectic group of talented people and mentor others to live their lives as richly whatever that means to them.

Who you aspire to be, what speaks to your soul as a child, is a mirror of who you are. You love what you see in that person or character because it is a reflection of you! Show up in your life expressing your Inner Auntie Mame, Ninja Warrior, your hero.

2. What energizes you? Think back to a time when you were ‘in the zone’. You were totally present, in the moment, doing whatever it was that you were doing, enjoying it fully without any sense of time and space. You were totally focused and bursting with creativity. These ‘in the zone’ experiences are windows to see your special gifts, your unique talents. You are energized, firing on all cylinders. These are the moments that you are expressing YOU fully.

“The best thing you can do is get good at being you!” – Denis the Menace

As an example, here is an anecdote about Krista Vernoff, Head Writer and Emmy Award nominee for the television show, “Grey’s Anatomy”. Even though she loved to write, Krista thought she was supposed to be an actress. She held a belief that one had a better shot at making a living as an actress than as a writer. Bar-tending was suggested to her by many well meaning relatives worried about her career choice. She got quite good as an actress and was making a living at that craft. Still, she couldn’t tear herself away from writing. Writing came so easy for her that she didn’t give herself much credit as a writer. “You have to work hard for a living” and she was definitely working hard to be a working actress. For Krista, being an actress was exhausting! Writing was playful, what she did for fun, what she did to feed her soul. Success as a writer was always a certainty.

One day a fellow actor in a play noticed that Krista would run to her dressing room to write whenever she wasn’t needed on stage. Most actors lived to be on stage where Krista lived to be offstage where she could write. Once this fellow actor commented on this upside-down state of affairs, Krista realized that if she was going to live a fulfilled live she must acknowledge and honor who she is – a writer. At the end of the play’s run, Krista devoted her life to expanding and express her raison d’etre – to write!

When you commit, give your full attention and energy to standing firmly centered in the truth of who you are, life is magical. You have fed your soul, you are whole. As a complete person, you have the inner resources to give to others whether that be through your craft or through your presence in their lives. You have the energy and desire to share you with the rest of the world. You live life on purpose, in the zone, and tapped into the passion and wisdom that is yours and yours alone. This is what you are here to do. Find a way to spend more time doing what gets you ‘in the zone’.

If you are not satisfied or fully engaged in your life you have a choice. Will you remain committed to this unfulfilling life or will you discover and commit to your raison d’etre. A fulfilled life begins when you go beyond the outer threshold of your comfort zone. The choice is yours.

“Be who you are and say what you feel. Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” – Dr. Seuss

Copyright (c) 2009 Valery Satterwhite