Building a Positive Personality

He would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run…..Friederich Nietzsche

Accept Responsibility

Responsibilities gravitate to the person who can shoulder them.. Elbert Hubbard

When people accept additional responsibility they are actually giving themselves a promotion. Responsible behavior is to accept accountability. That represents maturity. Acceptance of responsibility is a reflection of our attitude and the environment we operate in.

People who don’t accept responsibility shift the blame to their parents, teachers and genes, God, fate, luck or the stars. Responsibility involves thoughtful action.

Show Consideration

Show consideration, courtesy and politeness. Thoughtfulness shows a caring attitude.

Think Win-Win

When we serve our customers, our families, our employers and employees, we automatically win.

Choose Your Words Carefully

Person who says what ever he likes usually ends up hearing what he doesn’t like. Be tactful. Tact consists of choosing one’s words carefully and knowing how far to go. It also means knowing what to say and what to leave un-said. Words reflect attitude. Words can hurt feelings and destroy relationships. Choose what you say rather than say what you choose. Excessive talking does not mean communication. Talk less; say more.

A fool speaks without thinking; a wise man thinks before speaking.

Don’t criticize and complain

When I talk of criticism, I refer to negative criticism. When a person is criticized, he becomes defensive. A critic is often like a back-seat driver who drives the driver mad.

Smile and Be Kind

Cheerfulness flows from goodness. A smile can be fake or genuine. The key is to have a genuine one. It improves face value. A smile is contagious and is an inexpensive way to improve looks. A smiling face is always welcome.

Put Positive Interpretation on Others People’s Behavior

In the absence of sufficient facts, people instinctively put a negative interpretation on others’ actions or inactions. Some people suffer from “Paranoia”: they think the world is out to get them. That is not true. By starting with positive assumptions, we have a better chance of building a pleasing personality resulting, in good relationships.

Be a Good Listener

Listening shows caring. When you show a caring attitude towards another person, that person feels important. When he feels important, what happens? He is more motivated and more receptive to your ideas.

An open ear is the only believable sign of an open heart…..David Augsburger

In order to be a good listener:

* Encourage the speaker to talk.

* Ask questions. It shows interest.

* Don’t interrupt.

* Don’t change the topic.

* Show understanding and respect.

* Pay attention, concentrate.

* Avoid distractions.

* Show empathy

* Be open-minded

* Concentrate on the message and not on the delivery.

* Recognize the nonverbal communication, such as facial expressions, eye contact, etc.

* Listen to feelings and not just words.

Be Enthusiastic

Nothing great is ever achieved without enthusiasm…….Ralph Waldo Emerson

Enthusiasm and success go hand in hand. Enthusiasm inspires confidence, raise morale, builds loyalty and is priceless. Enthusiasm is contagious.

Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation

Sincere appreciation is one of the greatest gifts one can give to another person. It makes a person feel important. The desire to feel important is one of the greatest cravings in most human beings. It can be a great motivator.

When You Make a Mistake, Accept it And Move On

Some people live and learn while others live and never learn. Mistakes are to be learned from. The greatest mistake a person can make is to repeat it. Don’t assign blame and make excuses. Don’t dwell on it. When you realize your mistake, it is a good idea to accept responsibility for it and apologize. Don’t defend it. Why? Acceptance disarms the other person.

Discuss But Don’t Argue

An argument is one thing you will never win. If you win, you lose; if you lose; you lose. If you win an argument but lose a good job, customer, friend or marriage, what kind of victory is it? Pretty empty. Arguments result from inflated ego.

Arguing is like fighting a losing battle. Even if one wins, the cost may be more than the victory is worth. Argument is nothing more than a battle of egos and results in a yelling contest. A bigger fool than the one who knows it all is the one who argues with him!!

Don’t gossip

Remember, people who gossip with you will also gossip about you in your absence. Gossiping and lying are closely related. A gossip listens in haste and repeats at leisure. A gossip never minds his own business because he has neither a mind nor a business. A gossip is more concerned about what he overhears than what he hear.

“Small people talk about other people, mediocre people talk about things, great people talk about ideas.”

Gossip can lead to slander and defamation of character. People who listen to gossip are as guilty as those who do the gossiping.

A gossip usually gets caught in his own mouth trap. Gossip has no respect for justice. It breaks hearts, it ruins lives, it is cunning and malicious. It victimizes the helpless. Gossip is hard to track down because it has no face or name. It tarnishes reputations, topples governments, wreck marriages, ruin careers, makes the innocent cry, causes heartaches and sleepless nights. Refrain from indulging in gossip.

Turn Your Promises into Commitments

A promise is a statement of intent. A commitment is a promise that is going to be kept no matter what. Nothing lasting has ever been created without commitment. Commitment leads to enduring relationships through thick and thin. It shows in a person’s personality and relationships.

Be Grateful But Do Not Expect Gratitude

Gratitude is a feeling. It improves our personality and builds character. Gratitude develops out of humility. It is a feeling of thankfulness towards others. It is conveyed through our attitude towards others and reflects in our behavior. It teaches us the art of cooperation and understanding. Gratitude must be sincere. A simple thank you can be gracious. A gracious attitude changes our outlook in life.

Gratitude ought to be a way of life, something that we cannot give enough of. It can mean a smile, or a thank you, or a gesture of appreciation.

Avoid Bearing Grudges

When a person refuses to forgive, he is locking doors that some day he might need to open. When we hold grudges and harbor resentments, who are we hurting the most? Ourselves.

Practice Honesty, Integrity and Sincerity

Honesty inspires openness, reliability and frankness. It shows respect for one’s self and others. Integrity is found in a person’s character.

Practice Courtesy on a Daily Basis

Courtesy is nothing more than consideration for others. It opens doors that would not otherwise open. A courteous person who is not very sharp, will go further in life than a discourteous but sharp person. It is the little things that make a big difference. Small courtesies will take a person much further than cleverness. Courtesy is an offshoot of deep moral behavior. It costs nothing but pays well. Courtesy can be a warm smile or a thank-you. It is a small investment but the payoffs are big.It enhances the other person’s self-worth.

Develop a Sense of Humor

Have a sense of humor and you will possess the ability to laugh at yourself. A sense of humor makes a person likable and attractive.

To Have a Friend, Be a Friend

A fair-weather friend is like a banker who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and takes it back the minute it rains. Mutual trust and confidence are the foundation stone of all friendship.

Show Empathy

When you share sorrow, it divides; when you share happiness, it multiplies.

Practice Humility

Humility is the foundation of all virtues. It is a sign of greatness. Humility does not mean self-demeaning behavior that would amount to belittling oneself. Sincere humility attracts but false humility detracts.

Many years ago, a rider came across some soldiers who were trying to move a heavy log without success. The corporal was standing by as the men struggled. The rider asked the corporal why he wasn’t helping. The corporal replied,” I am the corporal; I give orders.” The rider dismounted, wen up the soldiers and helped them lift the log. With his help, the log got moved. The rider quietly mounted his horse and went to the corporal and said,”The next time your men need help, send for the commander-in-chief,”After he left, the corporal and his men found out that the rider was George Washington.

The message is clear. Success and humility go hand in hand. Simplicity and humility are two hallmarks of greatness.

Avoid Bearing Grudges

Don’t be a garbage collector. When a person refuses to forgive, he is locking doors that some day he might need to open. When we hold grudges and harbor resentments, who are we hurting the most? Ourselves.