Many people jump at the chance to delete or block their ex from their Facebook account as soon as the opportunity presents itself. It is usually a decision made in the heat of the moment, driven by anger or grief. But would it be more strategic to let your ex see what you’re up to for a while, before you lock them out of your digital world completely? There are obvious pro’s and con’s associated with either deleting them, or maintaining their digital friendship.

It is easy to get angry with the person you have just broken up with, run home, log onto Facebook and take great pleasure in deleting them from your friends list. So let’s analyse the pro’s and con’s of maintaining your ex partners digital friendship immediately after a break up. You can then decide for yourself what course of action best suits your situation or circumstance.

So lets start with the positives associated with holding off on clicking the ‘delete’ button:

1. You will be able to keep tabs on where they are, what they are doing and who they are doing it with by seeing their check ins, pictures and posts uploaded to their page. This could come in very handy if you move in similar circles and want to avoid “bumping’ into them at a popular bar or restaurant.
2. They may be the type to express their emotions digitally by posting on their wall how they have been affected by the breakup. This may give you an insight into their personality or feelings that they may not be able to display in person and/or bring clarity to the situation should it have ended abruptly?
3. You will see what they are saying to their friends and what their friends are saying to them which may provide valuable intelligence about the break up, that you wouldn’t otherwise be privileged to in person. You may be very surprised as to what may be made public after their friends think its all over with you.

Break ups can be hard enough as is without having to see chatter across cyberspace about the whole ordeal, so what are the negative aspects associated with leaving them on the friends list?

1. You may be exposed to discussion and/or pictures you may not want to hear or see. Examples may be your ex out on the town meeting people and partying while you are home feeling miserable. This can hurt and will not do you any good in the healing process, especially if they broke up with you!
2. He or she has the ability to stay across your every move and may even choose to “randomly” meet up with you and your friends when you are out on the town. This would be a nightmare if you were the one that ended things and wanted to move on and meet someone new. Cyber stalking is alive and well these days people!
3. They can still comment on your pages, pictures and posts – we all know how that may end up after they have had a few drinks. Oh dear!

Facebook has become a primary form of communication for many people these days, however it has its draw backs. Depending on the circumstances of your breakup and based on the pro’s and con’s discussed above, there is not a lot of benefit in maintaining a Facebook friendship with your ex as tempting as it may be.

At the end of the day, break ups don’t occur unless something is “broken”, so why not leave the past behind you and focus on meeting that next special person and get on with the rest of your life. Facebook can remain a happy, risk free place to continue to enjoy with your family and friends!

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